I've heard depression defined as anger-turned-inward by counseling professionals.

But I disagree.  We have two wonderful neighbors who lost their husbands that still grieve.  I prefer the term 'suffering'.  For example, think about the kids in Darfur refugee camps, who have lost all their family to unexpected genocidal violence, yet decide to play soccer, etc in those dismal settings.  But still cry.

'Suffering' is a better term, in my opinion.  It expands loss to allow a community supportiveness more than the self-centered connotation of 'depression'.

Today is Heidi's birthday.  And today Heidi has her second cataract surgery, a rare side effect of her chemotherapy. I have watched this wonderful woman deal gracefully with terminal cancer for two years now. With the cancer chemotherapy she's endured nausea, bone pain, surgery on both hands and exhaustion.

I watch her start each day in quiet worship and Bible study. Then she walks the property with our silly mutt. I see her joy in planting fruit trees, tending her vegetable garden and soon.. raising chickens!

Happy birthday, my darling Heidi!!

..it was in the mid 70's

I wish I could remember her name, but I can't(sigh).  I was helping my father build his new home in a Baptist Conference center in Glorieta, New Mexico, USA. I somehow met an amazing soprano that was working on camp staff that year.  She had lost a leg (diabetes?) but was fully active AND studying opera at college.

I was a pretty good piano player back then, and so asked if I could be her 'accompanianist' during her practice sessions while in New Mexico.  She preferred singing old hymns to opera, so I had to beg her to occasionally sing some of the great opera arias..and when she did, WOW!!! What a voice!  My entire spine would vibrate as her voice climbed above 'high C' into the stratosphere..

I hope she sees this blog and lets me & Heidi know how she is doing. I hope she is out there singing her heart to the world, despite such a devastating disease..

What a roller coaster.  A couple weeks ago, symptoms implied my own cancer was spreading - the last thing we need as Heidi battles on!

My surgeon agreed it was likely enough to warrant a scan of my kidneys, which happened a few days before the followup appointment on Good Friday.. an appt when my surgeon grinned at us and said there was NO cancer in my kidneys based on the scan, just a small kidney stone. 

Meanwhile, thinking of Easter tomorrow, I am struck by the symbolism for not only us, but every human on the planet - faith freeing us from death (whatever the cause).  It would be patronizing for me to in any way lessen the reality of suffering to a Darfur genocide refugee camp resident, or a human rights victim undergoing torture, or another cancer patient facing imminent death.  But I do think since every human suffers to some degree, a caring connection based on that suffering is a way to forget cultural, religious and philosophical differences for the sake of compassionate unity.

- Joe